Digital Therapy: Art as a means of Healing

     My father was a frustrated artist.  He was a creative talent.  As a young man he loved to draw, sketch and paint.  I believe art was a part of his soul.  A creative path could have definitely been in his future.  But life came along and he took on the responsibilities of family.  Raising four children and at times, holding down as many as four jobs at once, left little time for creative pursuits.  It wasn't until he was nearing retirement that he was able to take up his art again.

     My creative spark was writing or at least the thought that I could become a screenwriter.  It drove me to a near thirty year career in television for which I will always be grateful.  When that career ended suddenly I found myself lost and wondering what next?  Luckily, a few weeks after my sudden career change, my family and I, on a planned vacation, found ourselves in the home of my dear, dear friend, Laurel Bachmann.  I had known Laurel since high school and became close friends while working together at Parks Canada.  She became a valued spiritual leader and sounding board.  While visiting Laurel and her family on Salt Spring Island, B.C., she took it upon herself to continue my spiritual journey.  She did this while being treated for cancer.  She always amazed me.  One quiet afternoon she gave me a psychic reading.  She told me that I would begin to draw as a means of expressing myself.  Having watch my Dad paint I had always wanted to be able to create that way but I couldn't even draw a straight line.  I put the suggestion away and we continued on our vacation.  A few months later I thought of what Laurel had told me and I picked up my first brush.  It has become an important part of my life.  It calms and invigorates at the same time.  I thank God, Laurel and my Dad for this wonderful new spark. 

     Both my father and my friend are gone now but they are a part of me and my art.   I miss them both very much.   Whether anything comes of this or not, I know that I have something that is mine and that will not disappear from my life suddenly.  I hope that my television/film career is just taking a well needed rest.  But if not, I know I will be alright.  Thank you to all who are a part of my life and who continue to be there for me.  Thank you.

Triggers

     A while back I spoke of the "Good Days and Bad Days" in my life.  For most, a "normal" bad day is taken care of by blowing off steam or a good night's sleep.  When you are depressed, a bad day means slipping into the dark side of yourself.  The one where you beat yourself up and tell yourself you are useless.  This dark side can last days or weeks and in extreme cases, years.  FYI --- I am a few day in the dark side kind of guy.  At my worst I think maybe I was there for 10 days.  But let me tell you, a hour, a day, a week or a year... this is not some place you want to visit often.
     So what triggers these trips to Darkland?  There are too many to list.  Most depend on the person. But for me, a disappointment of some kind can do it or change/pressure from work that I believe is not fair.  Also, if I have had a number of good days in a row.  That one is a head scratcher.  Of course we all get disappointed, face changes or come down after a great weekend.  Lulls are common.  We can't stay up all the time.  It's not natural.  We need to go low so we can learn to appreciate the highs.  Depressed people take these triggers and magnify them 100 times.  It weighs heavily on their souls.  Maybe they shut themselves away or go on an eating binge.  Some will turn to drugs or alcohol.  Maybe it's a dangerous stunt or situation.  Whatever they think will bring them out of that "place".   
     As outsiders to this destructive behavior, family or friends can be sympathetic.  But how long can that last?  I try to stay positive and I am sure that all my friends and family would say they are in it for the long haul but really... they must be getting as tired as I am.  If you find yourself in the dark zone don't forget that you have people who care for you.  They will always there for you as long as you remember to reach out and to keep in touch.  It is the most important thing you can do.