The Call Center Blues

  

Note:  I started writing this last Sunday hoping to  have it posted that night. Procrastination rules!


Sunday is a good time for me to write this latest episode. It's on Sunday that I wake up with a sense of urgency. I usually get up between 7 and 8 am. Why would anyone get up on a Sunday morning that early unless they had to ... right? I always wake up hoping that I will have the time to get "my projects" completed. Will I have time to write, paint, look for a new job or complete a much ignored chore? By Sunday afternoon the dread has arrived. It's only a few short hours until Monday and Monday means back to a job I dislike.  

Most people suffering from depression will tell you that it's their job that is to blame for their situation. For the last two and a half years that has been partially true for me. Now don't get me wrong. I work for a good company. The people I work with are fine people and they treat me well but its little consolation when by Wednesday your stress level has risen to Code Red.   I’m at my second call center right now.  The first was like being in hell.  A constant barrage of screaming and obscenities and that was just the employees in the washroom during breaks.  

Currently I work for an offices supply company.  When I applied for the job, almost two years ago, I thought ... I can do this.  I love office supplies.  There are so many things to organise your day and to make your life easier.  Selling them is another thing all together.  Every day I say the same things over and over again, making call after call in the hopes that someone will talk to me for more than two minutes.  Talking is a big component of the job.  At the end of each day I have to have spoken for 3.5 hours to clients.  Now this seems easy since the work day is 8 hours long but I suggest you try to time how long you are on the phone each day.  Most people may speak on the phone for an hour total.  And if you do talk for long periods of time it is likely not about office supplies. 

Most calls are the same.  “Hello, its Mike your Account Manager.”  Their response is usually a sigh, a hang up or an “I don’t have time for you today.”   I’m told not to take it personally but how can you not some days.  If I am lucky, each day I will talk to one or two clients with whom I have a good relationship.  They usually ask for help and I am more than happy to dig in and give them the assistance they need.  Customer service is the best part of the job but that is the problem.  That’s not my job.  I’m there to recommend products and sell them.  I get it but I fight it tooth and nail. 

By 6pm when I leave I am so mentally drained I do not have anything else to give. My wife and son are lucky if I grunt at them.  The weekends are used to re-energise but by Sunday I know I have to start the ride all over.   

So that is where I am right now.  I am starting to look out there again and I hope that I can find my way back to a vocation that I loved and was meant for.  Wish me luck.

 

 

Forgive and Forget? Yeah right!!!






So ... it's almost a week since my first post. I am touched by how many of you have responded in some fashion or another. Thanks so much. When I look back at what has brought me to this dark place I see so many triggers. I expect I will explore all of them within this blog at some point but today I wanted to say goodbye to a demon that has been plaguing me for quite sometime.

On June 15, 2010 I was asked by my Supervisor to come downstairs to an empty room in the building where I worked. It was then that I found out that my life was going to change drastically. My boss looked at me in the eye and with some emotion told me that there was going be some down sizing and that my job was seen as redundant. I was also told that it was only "business". Now all of this is likely true for the most part. For sometime I had grown restless and bored with my position and while a lay off was not what I was looking for I took it fairly well during that fateful meeting that warm June day. I choked back any emotions I had, smiled and shook hands with my Boss and the HR person who was there to help me in my transition. I walked out the door with my head held high.

Over the next few hours and days I beat myself up, convincing myself that I had done this to myself. I looked back on my twenty-seven year career listed the reasons that I was let go.

1. I was stubborn and argumentative with superiors when I felt that they were wrong.
2. I did not make friends easily. I still count only a half dozen or so people there that I would consider friends.
3. I did not care for the technical aspect of the position I was in and resisted training in favor of a more creative or managed organizational approach.
4. I kept to myself.

In other words ... I had screwed up big time. At that time I was not angry with them. It was my blame to bare. Over the next week or so, as I met with my supervisor and HR staff I smiled and nodded. I joked as I cleaned out my office that I was getting ready to retire the next summer anyway so this was okay. I gave advice about outstanding projects and inquired about bringing projects to them as an outside contractor. Everyone smiled back, shook my hand and then closed the door after me.

The summer passed quickly. I spent it vacationing with friends and volunteering at the local Film Festival. I took training on Job finding and waited to have the magic job genie grant my wish of the perfect job. By October I was in panic mode. I started to apply for jobs that I never imagined I would do. I spent my time daydreaming about working at my old job or finding a better suited position there. Soon those daydreams seeped into my unconscious and I dreamt at night about different scenarios where I would triumphantly return and be welcomed with open arms. It was hard to admit but I was angry. But I didn't want to them to know that I was angry. The last thing I wanted is to give them the satisfaction of knowing that they had won. The thing is that they likely don't give me much of a second thought. Maybe I come up in conversation sometimes... "Remember when Mike did that thing."

So it's time to say goodbye to this particular demon. What is past is past. I want to grow not shrivel with hatred. No one deserves that. They're not evil. They have issues and problems of their own. When I look at the list above now and think back to my contributions to that organization I can dismiss most of what is written above. I am proud of what I did there and happy to have been there. Yes ... I could have done better and so could have they. We all can do better. That's what I am trying to do now.

My next post I want to tell you what it's like for me now professionally. Stay tuned.